Kendrick Vinar

I received an email a couple days ago from someone who asked me, “What happens when Revolutionary Love goes bad?” The person went out on to describe how she had reached out with kindness and love to some in need. Her experience was not good. The person was not grateful and pressured her (with tears) into doing more. Her joy in giving turned into resentment and angry. On top of that she felt bad for feeling so “un-Christian”.

As I wrote her a response, I realized that her experience is quite common. Here is part of my email to her:

You have really reached out with love and kindness. Unfortunately, our acts of kindness of love are not always received with gratitude and a joyful spirit. One comforting thought is that the same thing happened to Jesus. In fact, Jesus tells us to expect it to happen and to not take it personally.

“If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours. But all these things they will do to you on account of my name, because they do not know him who sent me.” (John 15:18-21 [show]<div class="esv"><h2>John 15:18-21 <object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://www.esvapi.org/assets/play.swf?myUrl=hw%2F43015018-43015021" width="40" height="12" class="audio"><param name="movie" value="http://www.esvapi.org/assets/play.swf?myUrl=hw%2F43015018-43015021" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /></object></h2> <div class="esv-text"><h3 id="p43015018.01-1">The Hatred of the World</h3> <p id="p43015018.06-1"><span class="verse-num woc" id="v43015018-1">18&nbsp;</span><span class="woc">&#8220;If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you.</span> <span class="verse-num woc" id="v43015019-1">19&nbsp;</span><span class="woc">If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.</span> <span class="verse-num woc" id="v43015020-1">20&nbsp;</span><span class="woc">Remember the word that I said to you: &#8216;A servant is not greater than his master.&#8217; If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours.</span> <span class="verse-num woc" id="v43015021-1">21&nbsp;</span><span class="woc">But all these things they will do to you on account of my name, because they do not know him who sent me.</span> (<a href="http://www.esv.org" class="copyright">ESV</a>)</p> </div> </div>
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The reason the person didn’t respond well to Revolutionary Love is because they don’t know Him who sent Jesus. It’s not personal! Interestingly Jesus tells us that we’re not supposed to give and give and give and give and get taken advantage of by that person. It’s okay to say “no”.

“And if anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town.” (Matt 10:14 [show]<div class="esv"><h2>Matthew 10:14 <object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://www.esvapi.org/assets/play.swf?myUrl=hw%2F40010014" width="40" height="12" class="audio"><param name="movie" value="http://www.esvapi.org/assets/play.swf?myUrl=hw%2F40010014" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /></object></h2> <div class="esv-text"><p id="p40010014.01-1"><span class="verse-num woc" id="v40010014-1">14&nbsp;</span><span class="woc">And if anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town.</span> (<a href="http://www.esv.org" class="copyright">ESV</a>)</p> </div> </div>
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The question is when do you “shake the dust off your feet”? For me it’s when I don’t feel joy in giving. I feel that my gift is like pearls being trampled upon. I don’t want to be generous anymore, and I’m tempted to do it only out of obligation or pressure. I don’t write that person off forever, but I realize that I’ve done my part. I trust that God will send someone else across their path or maybe I could do something for them at a later time, but for now… the healthiest and best thing I could do for them (and me) is to say “no”. It takes faith to trust God to be give, and it takes faith to trust God to not – to realize that God can reach that person other ways besides me.

Much grace to you. My heart and prayers are with you.

Keep spreading revolutionary love – as God leads and gives grace.